I’m already okay

More wisdom from the damned Jersey Shore kid. On breathing and mantras, something my life coach suggested I do. One of his mantras is, “I’m already okay,” which made me giggle. I have it in my head that I’m broken down right now and in pieces and it’s just going to take time to get myself together again. Which is bullshit. I’m fine. I’m complete and sane and healthy right now. I may be hurting and I may cry more than normal lately, but I’m not broken and I’m not a mess. I’m just a human feeling some pain.

I think I’m seeing light at the end of the tunnel. Every once in a while, I’ll catch myself feeling down and wonder why, then remember, “Oh yeah, I’m in a shitty place right now.” It hurts less and less to come home to an empty house – although by hurting less, I mean my eyes only tear up a little, as opposed to being completely unable to stop sobbing.

With that comes fewer revelations though; it’s like a healing plateau. I think about my parents and my dog less and less and stop thinking about why I do the things I do, why I react the way I do, et cetera, et cetera. Which is good, I guess – life is for living, not analyzing. 

We’ll all float on, okay.

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One thought on “I’m already okay

  1. Yes, it is good to remember that we are okay, despite how the present moment may feel, isn’t it. Also as far as living and analyzing life, I think both are important. Living life is important and analyzing life is important. I think sometimes it’s important to do one, and sometimes (like when we are faced with painful situations that make us look inward), it’s important to do the other.

    I wanted to let you know as well that I have nominated you for the Readers Appreciation Award. (If I’ve already posted this somewhere, I have to apologize – I have an awful memory!) Click here to read more about it. http://nothinginmynoggin.wordpress.com/2012/06/03/reader-appreciation-award/. It’s completely optional, so don’t feel obligated to post if it’s not something that interests you. I was excited to receive the nomination for myself, however, and wanted to be able to share your blog with others, since I enjoy reading it. Cheers. -Brandic

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